thursday joke

[pobolycwm]

a flying saucer was flying across the misissipi , and the captain of the saucer noticed a man in a boat , who was singing,, DAT OLD MAN RIVER DAT OLD MAN RIVER,

so the captain told the crew to zap him up to the space craft for an experiment,

so they zapped him up and the captain took out half his brain then they zapped him back down again and were astonished to see him in the boat singing,

DAT OLD MAN RIVER DAT OLD MAN RIVER,

so the captain orderd his crew to zap him up again,

they did , and the captain cut out another quater of his brain leaving just the last quarter of his brain to see what would happen next ,

they zapped him back down to his boat , and they couldn`t believe their ears when he started singing DAT OLD MAN RIVER DAT OLD MAN RIVER,

so the captain said sod it zap him up and we`le take out the rest of his brain!! this is incredible !!

so they zap him back up and the captain removes the rest of his brain

then they zap him back down to his boat again and the man in the boat starts singing

FERRY CROSS THE MERSY COS THIS LAND,S THE PLACE I LOVE AND HERE I`LL STAY

 

[pobolycwm]

and another

A group of girlfriends went on vacation and saw a five-story hotel with a sign that read, "For Women Only." Since they were without their boyfriends, they decided to go in. The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors... go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide, since each floor has signs telling you what's inside." So they start going up, and on the first floor the sign reads, "All the men here are horrible lovers, but they are sensitive and kind"... the friends laugh and, without hesitation, move on to the next floor. The sign on the second floor reads, "All the men here are wonderful lovers, but they generally treat women badly." This wasn't going to do, so the friends move up to the third floor where the sign read, "All the men here are great lovers and sensitive to the needs of women." This was good, but there were still two more floors. On the fourth floor, the sign was perfect: "All the men here have perfect builds; are sensitive and attentive to women; are perfect lovers; they are also single, rich and straight." The women seemed pleased, but they decide that they would rather see what the fifth floor had to offer before they settled for the fourth. When they reach the fifth floor, there is a sign that reads: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that it is impossible to please a woman."

 

[SAS91]

secnd one made me smile first one didnt make sense cause im too tired

 

[Master_G]

2 good ones

G