Heres a couple i remember.
After learning Lucovsky was leaving to take a job at Google, Ballmer picked up his chair and hurled it across his office, according to the declaration.
Ballmer then pejoratively berated Google CEO Eric Schmidt, Lucovsky recalled.
"I'm going to f---ing bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again," the declaration quotes Ballmer. "I'm going to f---ing kill Google."
"My girlfriend always laughs during sex---no matter what she's reading." Steve Jobs (Founder: Apple Computers)
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." Tiger Woods
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet" Robin Williams
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked." Jerry Seinfield
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house." Rod Stewart
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." Robin Williams
"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. I said, "Thyroid
problem?" Arnold Schwarzenegger
"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." -George W. Bush, May 14
"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.'' -George W. Bush, Feb. 21, 2001
"We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House - make no mistake about it." -George W. Bush, Feb. 7, 2001
I don't feel old - I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. (Bob Hope)
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early. (Charles Lamb)
Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad. (W.C. Fields)
I like children - fried. (W.C. Fields)
He who can does - he who cannot, teaches. (George Bernard Shaw)
The first thing we do, let's kill all lawyers. (William Shakeapeare)
It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom. (Joan Rivers)
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. (Socrates)
A man is only as old as the woman he feels. (Groucho Marx)
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech - every now and then she stops to breathe. (Jimmy Durante)
The only unnatural sex act is that which you cannot perform. (Alfred Kinsey)
Exercise is bunk. If you are healthy, you don't need it: if you are sick you should not take it. (Henry Ford)
I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge. (Spike Milligan)
Either this man is dead or my watch is stopped. (Groucho Marx)
Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far. (Theodore Roosevelt)
What's wrong with being a boring kind of guy? (George Bush)
My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing will begin in five minutes. (Ronald Reagan, during radio microphone test)
Thank God I'm an atheist. (Luis Bunuel)
To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. (Paul Ehrlich)
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. (W.C. Fields)
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. (Mark Twain)
Serious sport is war minus the shooting. (George Orwell)
Remember, it doesn't matter whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose. (Darrin Weinberg)
I'm fat, but I'm thin inside…there's a thin man inside every fat man. (George Orwell)
I once had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall. (Eleanor Roosevelt)
It's not true I had nothing on. I had the radio on. (Marilyn Monroe, asked if she really had nothing on in a calendar photograph)
Chanel No. 5. (Marilyn Monroe, asked what she wore in bed)
When asked about the perks of being famous: (Spears was born in and lives in America) "I get to go to a lot of overseas places, like Canada" (irtney Spears)
After learning Lucovsky was leaving to take a job at Google, Ballmer picked up his chair and hurled it across his office, according to the declaration.
Ballmer then pejoratively berated Google CEO Eric Schmidt, Lucovsky recalled.
"I'm going to f---ing bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again," the declaration quotes Ballmer. "I'm going to f---ing kill Google."
"My girlfriend always laughs during sex---no matter what she's reading." Steve Jobs (Founder: Apple Computers)
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." Tiger Woods
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet" Robin Williams
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked." Jerry Seinfield
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house." Rod Stewart
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." Robin Williams
"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. I said, "Thyroid
problem?" Arnold Schwarzenegger
"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." -George W. Bush, May 14
"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.'' -George W. Bush, Feb. 21, 2001
"We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House - make no mistake about it." -George W. Bush, Feb. 7, 2001
I don't feel old - I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. (Bob Hope)
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early. (Charles Lamb)
Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad. (W.C. Fields)
I like children - fried. (W.C. Fields)
He who can does - he who cannot, teaches. (George Bernard Shaw)
The first thing we do, let's kill all lawyers. (William Shakeapeare)
It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom. (Joan Rivers)
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. (Socrates)
A man is only as old as the woman he feels. (Groucho Marx)
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech - every now and then she stops to breathe. (Jimmy Durante)
The only unnatural sex act is that which you cannot perform. (Alfred Kinsey)
Exercise is bunk. If you are healthy, you don't need it: if you are sick you should not take it. (Henry Ford)
I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge. (Spike Milligan)
Either this man is dead or my watch is stopped. (Groucho Marx)
Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far. (Theodore Roosevelt)
What's wrong with being a boring kind of guy? (George Bush)
My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing will begin in five minutes. (Ronald Reagan, during radio microphone test)
Thank God I'm an atheist. (Luis Bunuel)
To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. (Paul Ehrlich)
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. (W.C. Fields)
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. (Mark Twain)
Serious sport is war minus the shooting. (George Orwell)
Remember, it doesn't matter whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose. (Darrin Weinberg)
I'm fat, but I'm thin inside…there's a thin man inside every fat man. (George Orwell)
I once had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall. (Eleanor Roosevelt)
It's not true I had nothing on. I had the radio on. (Marilyn Monroe, asked if she really had nothing on in a calendar photograph)
Chanel No. 5. (Marilyn Monroe, asked what she wore in bed)
When asked about the perks of being famous: (Spears was born in and lives in America) "I get to go to a lot of overseas places, like Canada" (irtney Spears)
