That is not how it works fella. This is why there is so much confusion.
A game will look at the layout, then assign VRAM as it sees fit for the card. That does not mean that other cards would use the same.
For example, my 2080Ti allocates nearly 10gb VRAM in COD MW @1440p. That does not mean it uses that much, and would over load a 3070. Real world VRAM use is not really something you can monitor. You just need to keep an eye on performance, and if it drops off a wall you know that the game is eating too much.
See also - Cyberpunk at 1440p and above on a 3070. It's clearly 10-15% slower than the 2080Ti, whilst being pretty much exactly the same performance wise. It's clear it is streaming from RAM or something and taking a performance hit.
However, what I will say is "the more the merrier". IE - if the game is assigning that many assets into VRAM it is doing so to improve load times and so on.