A couple that was married for 20 years always made love with the lights off.
Well, after 20 years, the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit.
So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned the lights on.
She looked down... and saw that her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device -- a vibrator -- softer and larger than a real
.
She went completely ballistic. "You impotent
," she screamed at him, "how could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly:
"I'll explain the toy... if you explain the kids."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Management
I, The
, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
- I do physical labor.
- I work at great depths.
- I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
- I do not get weekends or holidays off.
- I work in a damp environment.
- I work in a dark workplace with poor ventilation.
- I work in high temperatures.
- My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely, The
Dear
,
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request, for the following reasons:
- You do not work eight hours straight.
- You fall asleep after brief work periods.
- You do not always follow the orders of the management
team.
- You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen
visiting other locations.
- You do not take initiative.
- You need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start
working.
- You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your
shift.
- You don't always observe necessary safety regulations,
such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
- You will retire well before you are 65.
- You are unable to work double shifts.
- You sometimes leave your designated work area before you
have completed the assigned task.
And if that were not enough, you are constantly seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely, The Management
Hope you like haha.:wavey:
Hmmm im sure you guys can replace the words with whats suppsoed to be there. Didnt think mail genetailia would be bleeped, sorry.
Well, after 20 years, the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit.
So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned the lights on.
She looked down... and saw that her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device -- a vibrator -- softer and larger than a real
She went completely ballistic. "You impotent
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly:
"I'll explain the toy... if you explain the kids."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Management
I, The
- I do physical labor.
- I work at great depths.
- I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
- I do not get weekends or holidays off.
- I work in a damp environment.
- I work in a dark workplace with poor ventilation.
- I work in high temperatures.
- My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely, The
Dear
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request, for the following reasons:
- You do not work eight hours straight.
- You fall asleep after brief work periods.
- You do not always follow the orders of the management
team.
- You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen
visiting other locations.
- You do not take initiative.
- You need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start
working.
- You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your
shift.
- You don't always observe necessary safety regulations,
such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
- You will retire well before you are 65.
- You are unable to work double shifts.
- You sometimes leave your designated work area before you
have completed the assigned task.
And if that were not enough, you are constantly seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely, The Management
Hope you like haha.:wavey:
Hmmm im sure you guys can replace the words with whats suppsoed to be there. Didnt think mail genetailia would be bleeped, sorry.
