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  #1  
Old 15-04-07, 09:59 PM
PP Mguire PP Mguire is offline
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Posts: 3,249
Few jokes

A couple that was married for 20 years always made love with the lights off.

Well, after 20 years, the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit.

So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned the lights on.

She looked down... and saw that her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device -- a vibrator -- softer and larger than a real .

She went completely ballistic. "You impotent ," she screamed at him, "how could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"

The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly:

"I'll explain the toy... if you explain the kids."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Management

I, The , hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

- I do physical labor.

- I work at great depths.

- I plunge headfirst into everything I do.

- I do not get weekends or holidays off.

- I work in a damp environment.

- I work in a dark workplace with poor ventilation.

- I work in high temperatures.

- My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely, The

Dear ,

After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request, for the following reasons:

- You do not work eight hours straight.

- You fall asleep after brief work periods.

- You do not always follow the orders of the management

team.

- You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen

visiting other locations.

- You do not take initiative.

- You need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start

working.

- You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your

shift.

- You don't always observe necessary safety regulations,

such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

- You will retire well before you are 65.

- You are unable to work double shifts.

- You sometimes leave your designated work area before you

have completed the assigned task.

And if that were not enough, you are constantly seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely, The Management

Hope you like haha.

Hmmm im sure you guys can replace the words with whats suppsoed to be there. Didnt think mail genetailia would be bleeped, sorry.

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  #2  
Old 15-04-07, 10:12 PM
mVp24 mVp24 is offline
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Posts: 1,941
Lol made me rofl.

Dunno if this will be labeled as appropriate for the forum, but it sure as hell was funny :P

Good find!
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  #3  
Old 15-04-07, 10:18 PM
PP Mguire PP Mguire is offline
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Lol thanx, im wondering if its appropriate too. Hopefully it is cause it isnt THAT bad but eh.
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  #4  
Old 15-04-07, 10:20 PM
mVp24 mVp24 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by name='PP Mguire'
Lol thanx, im wondering if its appropriate too. Hopefully it is cause it isnt THAT bad but eh.
The people that it's not appropriate for probably wouldn't get it tbh...
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  #5  
Old 15-04-07, 10:29 PM
PP Mguire PP Mguire is offline
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Yea but i know XMS and Kempez would, so if they brand it innappropriate then it is.
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  #6  
Old 15-04-07, 10:49 PM
mVp24 mVp24 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by name='PP Mguire'
Yea but i know XMS and Kempez would, so if they brand it innappropriate then it is.
Yup.

Kempez is brutal
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  #7  
Old 15-04-07, 11:17 PM
Bogel Bogel is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 294
Its still funny just dont know twhats behind the the angry red dudes
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  #8  
Old 15-04-07, 11:24 PM
FarFarAway FarFarAway is offline
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If you can tone them down a bit and replace the swear words then it can stay

If not I just delete it
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  #9  
Old 16-04-07, 12:06 AM
mVp24 mVp24 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by name='v a d e R`'
Yup.

Kempez is brutal
Quote:
Originally Posted by name='Kempez'
If you can tone them down a bit and replace the swear words then it can stay

If not I just delete it
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  #10  
Old 16-04-07, 12:30 AM
EvilWeevil EvilWeevil is offline
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A good laugh, although I must admit I didn't follow at first that the second was also talking about the male anatomy - had me guessing for a while
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